Thursday, June 25, 2009

Barack to Michelle: "Do That Again..."

This is too damn cute.

His face was priceless ... gotta love LOVE!
(jacked from Jezebel via Politico)

Video: Pill "Trap Goin' Ham"

"Going ham" is short for "Going mayhem" or straight crazy/hysterical. Yep, just like you, I learned that today and yes, again just like you, I think that is the most stupid slang I've heard since they mangled the use of the word "swag". And lastly, just like you, I will be saying it all this summer (when appropriate, of course)

Crack pipes + weed smoking + fake (for what we know) production of narcotics + crackheads + ass-bouncing shorty (she looks 15) = one of the realest videos to come out in the past five years. That's goin' ham.

(props to OnSmash)

Friday, June 12, 2009

SoooooooooooooWooooooooo: Raekwon - "New Wu" feat. Ghostface and Method Man

I'm on vacation right now (woohoo!) back next Saturday!

Props, once again, to OnSmash

Sunday, June 7, 2009

This Week In Philadelphia Eagles F*ckery...

I have no words for this item right here. Actually, I do ... WHY?!

Eagles receiver (and I use that term loosely -- boy hasn't caught a pass since he's been here) Hank Baskett is going to be featured on his girl's, Kendra of Girls Next Door fame, new reality show called, of course, Kendra. My first question is this: How did the Eagles let this happen? My second question: Why did the Eagles let this happen?

Friday, June 5, 2009

Nike Has A Way Out...

Lebron and Lil' Dez in the house watching the Finals?

I wouldn't be surprised if Nike pumped this out in the days between LeBron's salty departure and last night's game.

(Spotted at JE Skeets Twitter. If you get a chance, check out his blog, Ball Don't Lie, and his recap show, The Basketball Jones, with Tas Melas. Great stuff).

Video: Xclusive


Hell no.

Honestly ... fucking no.

Love. Lust. Lasciviousness


I get a lot of flack for my crushes on athletes. Frankly, I don't care. You can fantasize about performing a two-finger split on Serena Williams but I can't wanna knock boots with this guy right here? Double standards for the motherfucking win.

Wednesday, June 3, 2009

One Year Ago Today...

Barack and Michelle Obama introduced the world to the "fist bump" ... really nothing new but man, people sure didn't know how to understand it.

True story. I was on the phone with my Dad when we heard that Obama was going to announce that he was the presumptive Democratic nomineee. When Michelle gave Barack the bump. I remember losing my mind like "Oh my god!! She gave him dap!!" To me, it was the cutest thing on the planet and one of those moments where you couldn't help but say "Yep, they're Black." (like there was any doubt). I can't believe that was a year ago.

The Terrorist Fist Jab: A Retrospective [Gawker]

White Folks Have F*cked Up Marriages Too, Right?

My favorite [pushes 'sarcasm' button] Pennsylvanian Republican, Rick Santorum...why?!

I think I know what he meant to say: Because of the well-documented stories of the death of Black marriage by the media (and Black folk), the image of the Obamas should be seen as a sign of hope for a community that openly dialogues their disgust and displeasure with the stories of out-of-wedlock children and high divorce rates.

What he said (or how it came off to me -- sue me): Because Black women cry and boohoo about not being able to get married and all these little Tyrones and Tamekas ain't got no daddies, the image of the Obamas will hopefully make dem Negroes get straight!


I, like many African-American women, am bombarded with the stories about Black-girl-love-lost and the "He needs his daddy!" tutorial of raising a child in Black America. While I do agree that positive images of Black love will influence our culture to do better (because we need to, let's not front), images of the Obamas can influence ALL CULTURES to love again. We have a 50% divorce rate in this country and I can be damn sure it ain't all Black people.

(Thanks to my favorite blog EVAH!, The Black Snob, for the video)

Tuesday, June 2, 2009

The Fear Game

America is the land of trends. Whether it be political (ie. "bash the Republicans"), social (ie. Follow me!) or fashion (Nike dunks, anybody?), this grand ol' country loves to be in the know of what's hot and especially what's not. In that sense, a trend seems real trivial, right? But in the history of the United States of America, trends can also be divisive, racist and downright disgusting.

Throughout history, Americans have been told who to be "in fear of" in society. There is always that one group of people whom we should be concerned about because they "hate everything that is America!" *salutes*. When the first Europeans hit our shores, it was the Native Americans (Thanksgiving...ha!). Next, it was my people who were considered to be a threat to society. You know, they rape our White daughters and suffer from draptomenia (you wouldn't want them running away... those mad, crazy Blackies *gasp*).

Fast forward a couple of decades and it turned into the European blame game; German and Irish immigrants were next on the fear docket. The Chinese and Japanese were next (internment camps, anyone?). Blacks, who will never leave the list of "feared peoples", had their second go-round except it was the "radical, X types" that you had to look out for. On the political tip, if you weren't Democratic, McCarthey was going to expose you - on TV! - for the "Red" person that you are. Cubans and Russians, you're next! Our Gay and Lesbian family are still on that list regardless of how many people still say "I don't have a problem with the gays -- even if I don't want them to have sex, adopt kids, get married and have rights because gays go against everything that is Christian! America!"

Today's leaders in the fear race are religious (like that's new). Since September 11th, Islam is the feared-religion-du jour. He looks Muslim, get him! At this point, it's a prerequisite to mention whether someone believes in Allah especially in any case involving this great nation of ours and its national security.

Look at this recent case of a double murder at a Army/Navy recruiting center.
A Muslim convert who said he was opposed to the U.S. military shot two soldiers outside an Arkansas recruiting station, killing one, police said Monday.

"This individual appears to have been upset with the military, the Army in particular, and that's why he did what he did," Little Rock Police Lt. Terry Hastings said in a phone interview.

"He has converted to (Islam) here in the past few years," Hastings said. "We're not completely clear on what he was upset about. He had never been in the military.

"He saw them standing there and drove up and shot them. That's what he said."

Hastings identified the man in custody as Carlos Bledsoe, 24, of Little Rock, who goes by the name of Abdul Hakim Mujahid Muhammad. [Source]

Why it is pertinent information to know that he's Muslim. What? That explains why he did it? Plus he Black and Muslim so he must be one of Farrakhan's boys right? Those are some scary Negros, ain't they? Hide from the bow ties! I live in Philadelphia so I should be shaking in the stilettos, right?

You know how many people in this country are opposed to everything that is United States military? Majority of them aren't Muslim, trust me. Mentioning his religion reeks of carelessness and xenophobia. It doesn't matter who - and which way - he prays to... he killed two young men.

Muslims aren't the only ones feeling the "fear this religion" fire. Evangelical Christians have always felt this mess but with gay marriage and abortion rights legislation on the forefront of every - Liberal - mind in this country, it only right to be afraid of the cross-bearing, Bible-verse-quoting, Bible Belt folk, right?

Let's look at the unfortunate murder of Dr. George Tiller. Many blogs, especially with the liberal blue shades on, already have tied the suspect to the "religious Right". Man, those Conservative Christians... always ready to kill someone that disagrees with what they believe!

Come on people, really? Some of the same people who cry, bitch and moan about discrimination against Muslims are the same folks who are quick to throw a Christian under the bus. First of all, there is no evidence that the suspect is "Bible-thumping zealot". I'm not Christian and trust me, third-term abortions bother me shitless. That doesn't mean taking someone life is the solution to the problem. Many Christians - of all denominations - will agree with me.

We've already been a country living in fear -- of what we don't understand. "Barack Obama's daddy was a Muslim, so our President must be a terrorist!" How stupid does that sound? Haven't people realized that by us living in fear of one another, we're putting ourselves in danger. Two wars and thousands of lives lost will tell you that.

Recruiter shot dead outside Army office [USA Today]

Suspect in shooting death of abortion provider George Tiller may be charged today [The Witchita Eagle]

Monday, June 1, 2009

Video: Bow Wow "Pole In My Basement"

Am I wrong to think that every chick that Bow Wow sexes is more than likely taller than him? I mean, any shorter would put him into Pretty Ricky territory.

(props to OnSmash)

Before They Were "Gay", They Were Pedophiles

Everyone now seems to be over Spectacular of Pretty Ricky's "promotional video" for his group's new single, "Tipsy". While Spec and the rest of the bois (see what I did there) of Pretty Ricky have been called every derogatory gay slur in the universe, one thing people tend to forget is that what Spectacular was doing isn't anything new. He's BEEN "grinding" (if that's what you wanna call it).

To 13 year old girls.

Anyone with a young niece, cousin, daughter, friend or sister will tell you. Young girls love them some Pretty Ricky. I mean LOVE. I wouldn't have a problem with this except that Pretty Ricky are some perverted bastards who consciously market their music towards hot, horny and (you would hope) hymen-still-intact young girls.

Case in point: Pretty Ricky had a bonus track on their second album, Late Night Special, called "Too Young" (listen to it here). In it, Pleasure P (who I happen to really like...future explanation in an upcoming post) sets up the song by singing:
"Shawty/I been staring at you (Girl I been staring at you)/Said I'm attracted to you (I'm attracted to you)/But you way too young for me girl".
Now, "way too young" can be interpreted in either two ways:

1) "young" as in lacking maturity and being childish or,
2) "young" as in jailbait

When you listen to the first verse, which happens to be rapped by Spectacular, you would automatically make a case for the immaturity/childish bit:
"But what's up with these childish games you playing on my phone number/ Attracted/ But I'm bout to leave you alone/Why you still acting like you in the 6th grade/...It's a shame bad news caught you at my crib/ Snoopin' through my room/.../When you finally grow up let me know"
The first time Pretty Ricky ain't singing or rapping about getting in those guts, right? But trust me, the song take a turn for the WORSE.

Check out a part of Baby Blue's (yes, the names are killing me softly too) verse:
"Girl you got a body like you 18/But you way to young for my fantasy/I would date you; but a player might get caught/And I ain't tryin' ta hear ya mami mouth in court"
Somebody page Chris Hansen, please! Every girl has heard that "you got a grown-ass body" line once or twice (shout out to all my girls who had C cups by 12 - puberty for the damn loss).

Slick 'Em's verse takes the fucking cake:
"2:30 in da school zone (all day)/You know I'm tryna fun wit' you (all day)/But got damn you wearin' dat thong girl (all day)/I'm thinkin' bout doin' something so wrong (something so wrong)/Everybody know the type/Walkin' down da street lookin' like 20 or 18/Baby girl fine/Off in da ride/Conversation just right/But we can't do nothin' that's a little jail time/I can't even risk it/Maybe we can chill or kick it/I'll be ya umm...Mr. Fix It/Play it from a distance/Got me wishin' you was 1 year older so I could get off in it/And uh if its grass on da football field, u know I'm gon' ball tryin'to get dem panty draws/Dey gon' put me behind bars, tryna grab it like a claw/And I'm like f**k da law/Oh law (Oh law)...I ain't scared/I ain't tryna to get caught Dead, Red handed/Abandoned from my family; it's goin' down like da Titanic"
You could play the "she's seventeen/wait one more year" line all you want to but what the hell?! What grown man hangs out in a gottdamn high school parking lot?! I know, I know...Chester the Molesters.

The sad thing about this is that I think Pretty Ricky wanted to use this song as a way to tell their younger fans that they have absolutely NO shot at bedding one of the members of Pretty Ricky, even if they play with their hormones and get them wet before they even know what that means (most 12 year-olds do and frankly, that bothers me). However, these are the same dudes that lead fellatio/cunnilingus chants at teen concerts and have young girls degrading themselves on YouTube by "dancing" to their music. You play with their hormones and now you wanna act like you weren't feeding into that? Please.

The real travesty in this: All of this makes me wonder about how young girls view their sexuality. For instance, I was a B2K FANATIC growing up and when I saw them in concert grinding on the stage, all of that meant that sexual acts were strictly on a physical nature. Like "I just wanna sleep with you because I'm horny not because you know, I actually have feelings for you". But as I got older and realized (ie. experienced) the emotional affects of having sex and its consequences, it became more than just bumping, grinding and orgasms. It actually became to mean something. I didn't just do it because my body was calling R. Kelly-style. Unfortunately, when we're young, it's the worst time to make mistakes.

Pretty Ricky "Too Young" Lyrics [AtoZ Lyrics]

LeBron is a Punk. Thank You and Goodnight

(Yep, it's been a while. It's called life)
(And yep...he isn't coming back to Cleveland)

Remember that kid who would complain when shit didn't go his or her way. You know, that one sucker who -- after a loss -- would take the ball and go home, salty as hell. Ladies and gentleman, we were all a punk ass move.

After Cleveland's 103-90 loss the Orlando Magic on Saturday night, LBJ walked his ass right off of the court. I'm talking grumbled and stumbled his ass into the locker room, threw some clothes on and went to the team bus. He straight left the building, Elvis-style.

Let's be real for a second. What LeBron did isn't some travesty against sportsmanship just because he didn't shake hands with his opponent or refused to do a press conference (he ain't the first or last athlete to do this). It's because he is LeBron James aka "King James" aka "The Next Jordan/The First LeBron James" aka "Jay-Z's cuddle buddy". Dude is the FACE of the NBA and for him to show his punk tendencies on this stage was tacky.

In all honesty, this wasn't a big deal to me until he opened his mouth yesterday and made this doozy of a comment...

"It's hard for me to congratulate somebody after you just lose to them," he said. "I'm a winner. It's not being a poor sport or anything like that. If somebody beats you up, you're not going to congratulate them. That doesn't make sense to me. I'm a competitor. That's what I do. It doesn't make sense for me to go over and shake somebody's hand." [Source]
What a way to be grown, Bron. Here he sounds super salty like he was sitting there with his arms crossed, pouting like a three-year-old. Honestly, it reeks of entitlement. He just knew that he was going to Finals this year (thank you Nike, Vitamin Water, one out of every three sports columnists and the NBA refs for gassing his head, great job).

Am I mad that he didn't shake the players' hands? Nope. Am I mad that he didn't do the press conference? Nope. Am I mad that he can't face his own insecurities and left his teammates to do that ish for him? Yep. Just because you are the next big thing, doesn't mean that you run away when shit doesn't go your way. It's called respect. Real competitors acknowledge their competition and he didn't do that. Emailing Dwight Howard doesn't count.